It’s not easy being a parent these days. Unlike our grandparents or parents time, they just gave birth, make sure the kids are fed and have clothing, basically that’s about it. Now, with education we received, we somehow know beside providing foods and cloths for the kids, we also have to cater to their physical, emotional and mental growth. And with the ever growing competativeness around us, it’s hard not to be kiasu. No matter how hard I supress to be a kiasu mum, I really can’t deny I’m one and the expectation I have in my kids to be a well-rounder.
When JS was very young, I signed her up for Gymboree classes. My reason, for her to socialise. Sometimes as parent, we actually pushing our kids to do what we want, what we were deprived from when we were young (the thought: last time I don’t get to to it, and I wish I have done it, now that I can afford… ), instead of acting according to their interest.
I have a list of things (lessons/activities) which I would consider for my kids to attend and I somehow got my reason for them to do so. (Of course that’s just my wish list and I’m trying hard not to make it real)
Activities available for kids/in my wish list: (So far only the first in my list has been materialized)
1) Music Class (JS’s is attending but has not specialize in any instruments)
Reason: There’s a saying 学音乐的孩子不会坏. (Kids with music foundation will not be easily influences by bad elements) and also the experts said music will help the right brain development (右脑开发) so the kids will have balance right and left brain development…. whatever. But I guess my main reason is that to follow the tradition in my family, as all my cousins and me were given music lesson when we were young, either in piano, violin or organs.
2) Drawing
Reason: JS loves drawing. It seems to be common extra activity most parents sign up their kids for.
3) Abacus/Mental Arithmetric
Reason: No reason..just in my list to consider. Most likely will not materialized
4) Ballet/Dance
Reason: To correct JS’s posture and walking. Because I have wanted to do it when I was young and never got a chance to.
5) Swimming
Reason: Form of exercise
6) Karate or any self defense class
Reason: Self defense… our society is not safe
7) Enopi/Kumon/Shicinda
Reason: SIL said beside being artistic (art and music class) maths is very important. But also most likely I wont enrol my kids. Because it’s not really training the kid’s mind to think..it’s basically spoon feed with lot of worksheets.
Bao Bei
Reason: Was tempted, because can learn Mandarin. Again, it’s just in my list that most likely won’t materialized, because it’s also a spoon feed method which I can do at home. The kids attended this will recognize many chinese characters, but sad that they don’t always understand the meaning.
9) Drama n Speech
Reason: Don’t know how this ended in my list. Just one option available after seeing advertisement on newspaper.
10) Outbound school
Reason: 2 of my cousins had actually attended this when they were young. It train them to be independent. Of course this makes them treasure the home more as they leave the cocoon of their home. But I guess when my kids were old enough, NS Training Camp will be just as good for them.
11) Buddhist Sunday School
Reason: This is a must go when they reach the age. Religion is important foundation for their characteristic and well being later.
12) Whatever holiday camp
Reason: Good past time for the holiday
13) Basket ball
Reason: A form of sport for WH, built him up physically and hopefully he can be a tall boy/man. So that no one can give him names like katek and short biologist.
If my mum knows that I have this wish list, I think she would strongly oppose to it. Though she’s giving a lot of tuition to pre-schooler and lower primary students (On the parents request) She doesnt agree on pressuring the kids this way.
I think I can really be a Kiasu mum if I don’t stop controlling myself. One thing for sure is I won’t sign up my kids for endless tuitions after school. I believe I’m capable to coach them in the comfort of our own home after ample of rest after school and again I know that I won’t be pushing my kids to score straight As. Rather to have them be a well rounder and proceed with their interest than pushing them. Very contradiction ME! I wish I could stay clear my mind when the time comes and not compare my kids with others and being KIASU.
