I wonder why the goverment in Malaysia has not impose a law that at least all children below 3 MUST travel in a car seat just like other “ang moh” countries and also in S’pore does. I have seen driver putting kids on the driver seat when driving not to mention young kids sitting on the front passenger’s lap and also worst young kids standing out from the sun roof while the car in going on quite high speed and navigating a corner. My family are among the majority of Malaysian, who has taken the child safety on road for granted, which still have a third world mentality when comes to travelling with kids in the car. Which still have the mindset that as long as I drive safely, as long as I hold on the child properly there won’t be any thing happen to the child. I wish I could be more insistent, but no one seems to take me seriously.
When I was pregnant with JS, one of the thing in my preparation list was to get a car seat. I redeemed one of those infant carrier car seat (for 0-12 months) from Bonuslink. Later on, SIL#1’s friend handed us down another infant carrier car seat (but this one can only last until the baby is 6 months old) and another forward facing car seat.
The infant carrier car seat is strapped permanently in my car which I use to ferry JS to the sitter’s place every day, and hubby will occationally have another infant carried in his car when he knows he has to pick JS up from the sitter’s house. It has never been permanently there, because to him, he finds that the car seat is space consuming. Every weekend family outing, my PILs will come with us in our car, so he finds the car seat a nuisane. (He drove a Waja then), because of the inconsistency, JS refuse to be strapped in the car seat when we are in hubby’s car, but she will sit quietly and behave in the car seat when travelling in my car. From the infant carrier, she “graduated” to the forward facing one at 13 months. We then bought another forward facing car seat because SIL offers to sent JS back home from sitter’s place occationally and I refuse to let JS rides in her car without being properly strapped up. We bought a bulky Chicco seat, which again is not permanently strap in either hubby or SIL’s car ( in fact we hardly use it and is still in very good condition..cost us RM700++). Asked hubby why he never put the Expensive car seat in his car, he replied “No space lah, where my father mother going to sit”
When WH is delivered, the only way to bring him around when I’m driving was put him in the infant carrier. But the problem arise. How am I going to secure the upright car seat in the back passenger seat?? (Again, this STUPID Malaysian designed car – KANCIL does not come with a back passenger seat belt) I have wanted to fix a seat belt in the car, but hubby gave up after visiting a few car accessories shops, they just don’t have it. Very reluctanly , I have to travel without strapping JS in the car. I was paranoid! Quite worried when I first let her sit behind by herself . Keep reminding her to sit still, not to play with the lock /door , not to climb up etc etc, put on the child lock and central lock the car as well.
Now that JS is going to be 4, she’s use to sitting and playing behind without been strapped up. WH has graduated from infant carrier and sitting in the forward facing car seats whenever we travels in MY car. The old forward facing seats has long been given away when we moved house. One of the infant carrier has been chucked in the storeroom at SIL’s house and another one in my boot. I think it’s a matter of habit and consistency. When they are in my car, they know their seats. But when in hubby’s car, they know they got a chance to roam free and would never want to be strapped up.
Worst still, one week before we were suppose to go to Fraser’s, SIL#1 called, “E, do you think all of us can fit into CW car?” ( That would be 7 adults + 2 kids) “I checked with CW first” ( eventhough I know that wouldn’t make sense, but still I have to tell her I need to check with hubby. Because I don’t want SIL to think that I’m always the controlling one at home and she always thinks that I’m the decision maker, in away or other to influence hubby’s decision against whatever about his family) “Darling, your sister said all of us go into 1 car lah. I think it will be very cramped, somemore JS need a seat by herself. You go tell your sister lah” (Ever since hubby changed his car to Naza Ria when I preggie with WH (with his Waja, with only 1 kid already full of stuff most of the time, so with 2 kids we need bigger car), SIL#1 will suggest all of us go into 1 car, for convinience. Both SIL owns a Beamer, BIL got a Merz, even FIL got his Kembara, but still they prefer to travel in 1 car) There were even times that SIL suggested that I sit in the front passenger seat holding one of the kids in front!! SIL#1 will always say, “So easy for everyone to go in 1 car huh” (yea, yea, but you are also putting the kids safety as stake)
Short journey is still ok, but long journey is really killing. The last time we travel long journey was to Malacca. I dreaded for the journey to over. FIL will always take up the front passenger seat. MIL due to her back pain and knee pain, she can’t possibly climb to the seat right back end, so she and SIL#1 (which is big size) will take both the middle seats. The maid, SIL#2 (petite), me and both the kids will have to go “third class” seats at the far end. It’s very bumpy to seat at the back, holding and balancing a very mobile kids. WH wants to be nursed, JS wants to sit on my lap at the same time, both kids fighting, crying, all these plus the bumpiness makes me more dizzy. SIL and MIL will offer to JS, “come sit with ah mah” “come, sit here with ku ma” but because of lack of space, JS tends to be grumpy and would not comply. I want to scream, please treat these kids as an individual. They are entitled for their own seat as well, not on our laps or squeezing in between us!!
There is this habit of JS when she’s in hubby’s car. She thinks that she’s in the airplane, her mummy and the maid is the air-stewardess to serve her (Not that she’s been on the plane before). First thing she got into hubby’s car is to sit comfortably on her seat then she will request us to put down the seat into a recline post, ask for her milk and then a blanket to cover her up (no matter cold or hot, she just need the blanket) Short or long journey, she will do so. So whenever there’s a lot of people in the car, and she don’t get her seat especially when she’s really tired and sleepy, she will get very very cranky. I know why she’s cranky, no one else seems to be able to listen to this cue and thought that she’s just plain manja. I can’t speak right up that she needs her space, that would not be quite a nice to say it in front of my SILs and PILs. ( I seems to have alot of obligation to my in laws that I need to jaga hubby’s face, not to put him in a difficult position of sandwishing between his wife and family. there are lot of things that I don’t agree to, but still must stay silent)
Now when we travel in hubby’s car, the car in like a war zone with things here and there. Tissues, shoes, slippers, books, pens , crayons, milk bottle, blanket, pillows all over the place and floor… and the kids are not restraint to their seat. They are good when in my car, but a real monkey in hubby’s car, of course I’m trouble with GUILT.
PS:/ I remembered seeing this advertisement from the kementerian on TV. Something about love yourself, love your children, buckled them up when travelling in the car. How come they just don’t enforce the rule and make it compulsory? How come they don’t set up a place that we can go and get to fix the seat belts for the back passenger seats for those old model cars?
The newer model of Kancil has got back seat belt already. ( I got mine in year 2002, without back passenger seat belts), went to the Perodua Service Center, asked them if they can fix for me, they said no such service, no spare parts. So BLARDY STUPID isn’t it!!
Posted by dragonmummy 
WH with ta ku ma (SIL#1)
The same place, 2 years ago, when JS was 15th month.
Clumsy Wife, Careless Mum 